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Zelle-Sama

The one of many names
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1 min read
Hello everyone I am loopy on allergy meds and thus I am selling commissions without being afraid of negative comments. I have examples here in this link. Go there and look
Go right now. go wow i feel sick

capricornian.tumblr.com/post/3…
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Wish me a happy birthday soon! I'm turning 19 on the 30th. :D

That's all. Seriously.
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It's here! At long, long last and I know you all were waiting for it! The very first premier and episode of Larry the LARPer! Larry -- your average D & D nerd -- discovers the world of Live Action Roleplay and his world is turned upside down!

!~  www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%…!

And okay, it's not necessarily a Hollywood grade start, but please remember this is the first time most of the characters have acted, the first time the director has attempted a show of this length and style, and it will most definitely get better as it goes along. We're working on episode 2 right now (Although, it won't be done for a while, since I left my costuming equipment in my dorm. ; --- ;  ) Also, you all should look out for me in Episode 3. ;D  But don't worry, I'll keep you posted! I may even do some fan art! You should too! <3

Love to all of you!
Ciao Ragazza~
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Things I'm Scared Of...

[x] the dark ( Not really the dark, as much as what could possibly be in it. Which is why I sleep with a nightlight. #I'mcool )
[] staying single forever
[] being a parent
[x] giving birth ( Men don't know shit. I< )
[] being myself in front of others
[] open spaces
[] closed spaces
[] heights
[] dogs
[] birds
[] fish
[x] spiders  ( I shudder to think of those who aren't)
[] flowers or other plants

Total so far: 3

[] being touched
[] fire
[] deep water
[] snakes
[] silk
[] the ocean
[x] failure
[] success
[] thunder/lightning
[] frogs/toads
[] my boyfriends/girlfriends dad
[] boyfriends/girlfriends mom
[x] rats ( Those things hide in the dark and then you step on them, and freak out. I know, I've watched Fear Factor.)
[] jumping from high places (heights)
[] snow

Total so far: 5

[] rain
[] wind
[] crossing hanging bridges
[] death
[] heaven
[] being robbed
[] falling
[x] clowns
[x] dolls (I'm not talking about barbies, I'm talking about those creepy ass porcelain ones and talking dummies.)
[] large crowds of people
[] men
[] women
[] having great responsibilities
[] doctors, including dentists
[] tornadoes

Total so far: 7

[] hurricanes
[x] incurable diseases
[] sharks
[] Friday the 13th
[] ghosts
[x] poverty
[] Halloween
[] school
[] trains
[] odd numbers
[] even numbers
[] being alone
[x] becoming blind
[x] becoming deaf
[x] growing up

Total so far: 12

[x] creepy noises in the night
[] bee stings
[x] not accomplishing my dreams/goals
[] needles
[] dinosaurs
[] the welcome mat
[] high speed
[] throwing up
[] falling in love
[] super secrets

Total so far: 14

If you wish to post this in your journal, it's been requested that you title it I'm afraid of ____ out of 72 common fears

If you get more than 30, I strongly recommend some counseling
If you get more than 20, you're paranoid
If you get 10-20, you are normal
If you get 10 or less, you're fearless

--------------

So I'm normal. How boring.
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Too much cake.

3 min read
I've been very depressed for the past couple days.

I know it doesn't matter to more than one or two people on here, but I've been suffering from and struggling with my clinical depression basically all my life. Like anyone else I have good days, and I have bad days. Today was definitely a bad day. I ate too much, slept too much, barely got off the couch all day and now I feel nauseous and disgusted with myself. I even tried to write a little, because sometimes it helps, but I ended up just deleting it all because I couldn't stand reading it.

There's so much I have to say.

I just feel so pathetic.

I've spent all summer doing nothing. Can't go to England because I have daddy issues, hate staying home because my mother's side is so fucked up. I both savour and despise the time I spend completely alone, because I don't have to worry about answering to anyone. Now that my sister is home, that has changed, and the brother who verbally abused us in years past is coming for a visit next week. He's been living a life of pure luxury in England, he just got back from Israel and my dad went to the Bahamas. My dad owns six cars. He has a huge two-level house, a live-in maid and nanny, two dogs, a bakery and a night club both doing extremely well. He took my brothers to Greece last winter.

And I haven't been on a proper vacation in almost ten years. Not even Florida, not even a beach, not even the lake of the fucking Ozarks.

He says he's having money problems right now, and that's why he can't help us more with paying rent and paying for college. But until he sells his damn cars, and deflates his pride and ego, I'm calling bullshit. He doesn't know fuck about money problems.

And that's my depressive self-pitying rant. I want to go to Universal Studios.

Anyway. I have freshman orientation on Monday and Tuesday for the college I'll be attending, so maybe having some kind of path for my near future will pull me out of this slump. I'll see about getting a job in the theater, will be starting up ballroom dancing lessons as soon as I can, and hopefully begin to love life again like I did at the beginning of the summer.

By the way, it's hot here. Really hot. It's ten degrees past "Damn son" and has already passed "People are dropping like flies" Celsius. Enjoy my dark humour.

That's all for now.

Cheers.
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Featured

Commissions by Zelle-Sama, journal

Aaand that's all folks. by Zelle-Sama, journal

LARRY THE LARPER -- EPISODE ONE! by Zelle-Sama, journal

Too much cake. by Zelle-Sama, journal

Auditioning by Zelle-Sama, journal